20 September 2017 @ 03:29 pm
Hello, everybody!! Could you, please, help me find:

1. Car accident fic. In this one, Jared and Jensen are fighting and Jensen leaves. It is storming (I think) and he crashes his car like two minutes after he left. Jared hears the crash, goes out and sees its Jensen and tries to save him. I remember Jared getting injuried because of broken glass on the road.

2. Any Non-AU fics told in Jensen POV foccusing on Jared's depression. Like how does he feels about it and how he wants to help/helps Jared. Bonus points if the fic goes deep and aligns to the descriptions of the past few years Jared gave on his chapter in "Family dont end with blood".

3. Break-up and make-up fics. I am looking for ones in which the guys break up and Jensen does serious groveling to get Jared back.

4. Jared helping Jensen get over a bad break and the two of them getting together later on.

5. Possessive! Jealous! Jensen.

6. Fics in which Jensen wants to get it on with Jared but doesnt because he thinks the sex will be super vanilla due to Jared's puppy!dog personality. Later they get together and Jared does surprise him in the kink department.
02 August 2017 @ 10:42 am
Hi everyone,

I am looking for a specific J2 fic I read a while ago. I have literally looked everywhere, so any help is appreciated.

In the beginning, Jared gives his plane ticket to a girl who wants to get home quickly, so he doesn't get on the plane. The plane crashes and everyone, including the girl, dies.

Most of the story occurs afterward where Jared is in a support group for people who experience survivors guilt and Jensen is the one that runs the group.

Thanks for your help!
I recently read a Destiel fic (linked below) where Cas is all dark and depressing while Dean is happy and unfazed by how weird Castiel is. So I'm trying to find more Destiel fics with this dichotomy. It doesn't matter if Dean just acts happy but he's really not. I just want Cas to be kinda weird, monotone, or depressing while Dean is bright, smiley, or just completely unfazed by Cas's weirdness. Also, I would especially prefer it if it were AU.

These 2 fics are some really good examples:

Thanks for any recommendations!
04 June 2017 @ 11:45 pm
I read this AU Destiel fic a long time ago where Dean is depressed and sometimes it gets very bad. Sam is with Jess and they try to help him. Then he meets Cas and they get together. But Dean has an episode of extreme depression and ends up killing himself, thinking Cas would be better off not having to deal with him. I think he jumps out window in front of Cas? Cas then later also kills himself.

Yeah, very tragic ending. But if anyone can help me find it that would be great!
31 May 2017 @ 05:14 pm
Hi guys! I hope I'm doing this right, if not, just let me know and I'll fix it :)
Anyways, I was hoping you could help me find a few stories I've been feeling like reading.

These are all Jensen/Jared or Dean/Sam with bottom (hopefully Omega!Jared). Anything with Sam/Jared being abused or treated as less than a equal individual (Usually it's because he is an Omega) and generally Dean/Jensen being the cause of Sam/Jared's pain.

The twist in this though, is that I hope y'all can find me a Sam/Jared who will not stand for being treated so and would rather take his own life than 'submit' or being treated as a lesser being.

I really, really hope the fic has a happy ending, meaning that Dean or Jensen completely changes and begins treating his poor boy as his little prince, coddling, loving, and caring for Sam or Jared.

Thank you so much for helping me out here! I'm looking forward to everything everyone has to share :)
Current Mood: sad
30 May 2017 @ 01:24 pm
Hi guys,

I just saw the clip from the con where Jared revealed the spoiler.

I don't want to he more specific!

I've been feeling sorry for him, because this could get him in trouble.

Since we know that he suffers from depression, and we know that Jensen loves and supports him, I started wondering.

Are there fics yet about this event?

If not...maybe this will inspire someone to write one!

If there are no fics like this, I'd love recs for similar stories where one if the guys messes up at work, and the other helps or comforts

Gen or slash is fine.


Hey folks! I'm looking for a specific Destiel AU from a few years back.

Dean's a middle or high school teacher living with Sam and Jess and suffering from serious depression. I remember there's a part where he gets in bed at the end of the school week and doesn't leave it all weekend :(
Cas, if I remember correctly, is a new teacher at the school. He and Dean subsequently fall for each other and I think maybe move in together at some point because Sam and Jess have a baby.

Ring any bells?
24 February 2017 @ 10:53 pm
A second post today - so sorry !! There's this wincest fic that I've been looking for ages - in that story, Sam is in love with Dean, but Dean isn't into Sam. But he goes along with the physical relationship for some reason - in the dead of the night / complete darkness. Sam is happy with this in the beginning, and keeps waiting for Dean to acknowledge the relationship, but he doesn't, so Sam realizes that Dean is just going along with things for his sake, and puts an end to it. But by this time, Dean is beginning to come around too. This story may be illustrated - I think one scene has Dean sitting alone on a cot / bed.

Another wincest fic that I'm looking for has the boys settled down somewhere near the seaside. One of them is doing a radio show (I think Sam?) while the other is suffering from acute depression, and is pretty suicidal.

Sorry for being so vague, any help would be greatly appreciated !!
06 February 2017 @ 04:53 pm
1.) So I read this fic a while ago and it was on LiveJournal somewhere not sure if it's in ao3 or not. It's Stanford era and Deans feeling really alone. John left and Sam stopped calling him, on the hunt he goes on this witch made this sort of Sam clone/thing that was suppose to kill him in a month or so but the 'sam' ended up atttached to him. Months later the real Sam shows up and Dean is mind controlled by the 'sam' to try to kill him but Sam and Bobby end up killing it.

2.) I was looking for some hurt dean (probably Stanford era or Au Idc) where Dean gets sent to the hospital and wake up in a coma months later. But john and sam don't show up and Dean is tragically hurt by that. (Self esteem issues Dean feeling alone) any fic that has something to do with Dean being alone and hurt is good with me.

3.) So I never really see a lot of Dean and Sam fighting and Sam being wrong fics. I was wondering if there's some kind of fic where Sam says something super horrible/hurtful to Dean and ultimately makes him feel like shit (and thinks that sam doesn't care but he does) I just want a boys fighting one where Dean ends up emotionally hurt or right during the argument. I really want Sam to be kinda an asshole in it. ( love sam! But I just don't see many of these)

Thank you all!
Hello! I'm looking for a specific fanfiction that I just can't find anywhere! I think it's based around 9x13 The Purge, after Dean and Sam have their fight, but I can't say for sure. Sam leaves the bunker, and Dean is left heartbroken. Sam goes back to college, gets married, haves a kid I think, and he calls Dean once a month or so. That was until Dean smashed his phone. Cas isn't in this story, and in the end Dean does something terrible, and Sam doesn't find out until 4 months later or something? It could possibly be a one!shot, but I'm not sure. The whole story describes Dean's depression and is very well written. Thanks in advance!

(Found by the lovely person in the comments who knew the title of this amazing story.)
08 December 2016 @ 10:13 am
Hey y'all!
Huge throwback search to a specific scene from the season finale of season 4. Where "Dean" (Zachariah) left a hateful voice mail to Sam about how he's a monster.

I'd like any fics that deal with that voice mail. Especially if Sam is depressed/hurt from the voice mail, suicidal even. I don't know why but I like to feel their heartache. I'm weird.
Wincest preferred.

I just finished reading Couples' Counseling by Lazy_daze and was craving some unresolved tension/misunderstanding.

Please and Thank you in advance guys!
Hello, first time posting anywhere so apologies for any mistakes.

I am looking for a fic I read a few years ago. I believe it was Sam/Dean and mpreg. From what I remember Sam was pregnant with Dean's baby while Dean was away (I think in purgatory). The baby doesn't make it and Sam keeps the ashes in a box that he acts sketchy about when Dean returns. Sam seems very depressed, Dean is angry. Dean thinks it's drugs or something bad in the box and dumps out the ashes in a pond...? i don't really remember anything else. Does anyone have any idea what this story might be?

Hi (:

1. I'm looking for a fic I started reading a couple of days ago on fanfiction.net that i didn't get to finish. I forgot to bookmark it and I don't remember the title but it was about the boys when they were teens and Sam was acting kind of sick/depressed and Dean was really worried about him. Sam broke down one morning and Dean made him stay home from school... The last chapter I read had Dean stopping a robbery at a diner, but not sticking around to talk to the cops because he wanted to get Sam back to the motel. Sorry its not much to go on. Also, I dont know if the fic was finished or not - it might be a WIP. -Found! It's Open Book by pineapplefan

2. Also, with the holidays coming up, I've been trying to find some good Christmas fics. I've already read The Christmas Spirit by Noxbait, but that's a good example of what I'm looking for (the longer the better, and I love hurt/comfort)! I'd love to hear your recommendations! - only gen please!

Thank you!

28 October 2016 @ 06:21 pm
Looking for a J2 story, takes place after Supernatural is off the air. Jensen visits Danneel in mental hospital and runs into Jared's sister and realizes that Jared is also a patient at that hospital. Jensen wants to help Jared get better. Don't remember a lot, but both j2 suffered some kind of tragedy. Does anyone remember this?

Thank you,


**Found, link in comments**

Thanks so much!
23 October 2016 @ 11:22 pm

I'm looking for a specific supernatural rpf fic. I believe they were both in high school. Jensen was popular, Jared was a bit of a loner. Jensen was dared to befriend Jared and give him a makeover and get him a date for some sort of school function. Jensen's cousin was a hair stylist I think. Anyway, Jared found out, things got tense, but eventually worked itself out. If anyone has any idea of what story this is, please let me know. Thank you!

Also, I've been reading stories with mute/deaf/blind Sam/Jared and mentally ill/mentally disabled/autistic Sam/Jared and homeless Sam/Jared. I think I've read all that's been posted, but just in case, if you know of anything that is a bit harder to find, like isn't labeled for it, please let me know that too.

Thank you!

Story found! Title:My Problem is You Make Me Melt http://juice817.livejournal.com/200810.html or http://archiveofourown.org/works/6542323?view_full_work=true
Hello, I'm wanting to read stories based on events (or after) 9x13 (The Purge). I was looking at ff.net and AO3, but wanted to get reading suggestions.
If possible, I prefer stories in which Dean must deal with the words of Sam, preferably if Sam understand that exaggerated or said the wrong thing.
I usually prefer Gen, without pairing, but I have no trouble reading Destiel. No wincest, please
Alright, so it has been years since I have posted to spnstoryfinders. I've kept up with the show but tend to only focus on one to two fandoms fic-wise at a time. Writing in the Queer as Folk fandom pulled me away from my other ones for a while but now I am back and ready to read some great stories in this fandom that I may have missed in the past few years. Not a huge fan of Wincest, Sabriel, Samifer (unless it is dubcon or noncon) or complete AU (but am completely fine with canon divergance.) So, if possible, I would rather not have those pairings in the non-AU stories you share.

1. Dean/OMC: Are there any fics where Dean runs into a guy he had a fling with years before? Maybe it was a secret relationship he had in high school or while Sam was away at Stanford. Dean and the OMC could pick things up again or maybe they just catch up and Dean is happy that the OMC has a decent life. It would be great if Sam found out about it but it's not absolutely necessary. Destiel, Dean/OMC, or gen are all okay for this. It can take place any season, but it would be awesome if it took place in season 10, 11, or even after. For some reason I am really craving to read this but if none of you lovely people can find it, I'll just write it instead ;)

2. Dean/Castiel: If you all could rec your favorite Dean/Castiel fics written from 2012 to 2016, that would be awesome! I do love angst, but I also love humor and crack just as much. Of course, I will also take recs to earlier Destiel stories.

3. Awesome!Sam: I would love to read stories about Sam not only supporting Dean (either coming out as bi or his relationship with Cas or an OMC) but also have a storyline of his own, whether it be dramatic, romantic, or otherwise. In other words, I want him to be rooting for his brother's happiness but I want the story to also take Sam's own life into account and for it to cover what he's going through, making him a major and complex character throughout the story.

4. Wedding!Fic: As long as it is not Wincest or Daddycest, this can be any pairing. I am looking for humorous, non-AU wedding fics. Destiel would be lovely but Dean/Lisa, Dean/OMC, Dean/OFC, Dean/Benny, Sam/Jess, Sam/Amelia, Sam/OFC, Sam/OMC, Charlie/Dorothy, Charlie/OFC, John/Mary, and Bobby/Ellen would all be great options as well.

5. Depression: Can you all rec stories where Sam, Dean, or Cas are going through severe depression and stay relatively in character throughout it all? Of course, depression can completely distort your normal reactions to day to day life, but I would like them to be recognizable while the other characters grow more and more concerned over something being very wrong.

6. Long shot but...: Are there any stories where Dean is worried how his close friends and family will react to him being bisexual and they literally do not even care because the apocolypse is going on or the mark of Cain made him butcher people and they still love him despite that and that's a lot more concerning than him messing around with dudes. In other words, there are bigger concerns than who Dean sleeps with and now is not the time to fret over something rather trivial in comparison to people dropping like flies.

7. Sam finds out Dean was enrolled or is currently enrolled in college classes: Maybe Dean took them while he was with Lisa or maybe he's taking them online. Sam could find a document containing Dean's research paper, essay, creative writing project, whatever. Or maybe he answers Dean's cellphone and it is Dean's advisor checking in on how he's doing and if he would consider enrolling for the new semester since the advisor sees a lot of potential in him. Either way, I just would like to see Sam finding out and being proud of him, all while asking questions while Dean feels a little embarrassed about taking classes in his mid to late 30s.

8. Queer as Folk crossover: Since I have written over 20 stories in the Queer as Folk fandom and love the characters ridiculously so, can you all come up with some stories where the boys cross paths with the Liberty Avenue gang? Maybe they are on a case in Pittsburgh and it is directly affecting the characters in QAF? Maybe Brian tries to seduce Dean (and succeeds because I am sure the straightest of men would let themselves be fucked by Brian Kinney) or Emmett takes Cas shopping for more fabulous clothes or Sam gets into passionate discussions with Mel, who is a lawyer. In other words, I would like to see these characters meet and actually get along.
25 June 2016 @ 08:04 pm
Hi! As I've pretty much combed through the entire AO3 tags and spn pinboard I wanted to ask here as well and see if anyone can point me in the right direction: I'm looking for recs or links to any and all fics that deal specifically with self harm/self injury in ADULT characters (20+) as the main focus of the story. Any genre, any characters, any pairing. I am not looking for highschool AUs or storys depicting teens or younger self injuring. But if it starts with them being younger and then goes on into adulthood, that would work!

What would be amazingly ideal would be non-AU fics involving Dean, Sam, Castiel, or their actor counterparts (Jensen, Jared, or Misha) and involve them being helped or taken care of but again I will take absolutely anything you know of. Thank you!
05 March 2016 @ 09:31 pm
Hello everyone! I am looking for a AU J2 fic where Jensen had some sort of problem with depression. I believed he was on a very strict diet where he couldn't drink any alcohol or coffee because he had overdosed on pills at one point. I know at the end of the fic he starts to take pills again and Jared frantically goes to his house but Jensen didn't do it. That's all I remember.
..Enter Jensen who just got out of jail & is helped by Danneel to get a job with her at Jared's cafe as a baker. During Jensen'sjensen's employment there both Danneel & Jared worry and watch over Jensen. Jared's family are jerks and his mother sets Jared up with Tahmoh Penikett who nearly rapes him.

Does this sound familiar to anyone out there?

Thank you!
01 February 2016 @ 01:02 am

Hi guys, Ive been looking for two specific J2 fics for absolutely ages so if anyone could help me out that would be amazing!

1) J1 has a new house and is depressed (I think mainly because of an ended relationship?) and J2 is the person hired to fix up/ decorate the house. I remember that J2 spent most of the time just chatting with J1 and cheering him up while the rest of J2's buddies actually worked on the house and I think that in the end they ended up moving in together.

2) Dragon!fic. J1 is a knight(?) who sets out to save a princess (maybe Sandy?) who has been kidnapped by a dragon (Danneel). When he finds her it turns out that Danneel and Sandy are together and she was only 'kidnapped' so that they could be together. Somehow this leads to J1 and J2 meeting and they hit it off from there.

Sorry these descriptions are pretty vague but if anyone knows what I'm talking about then that would be amazing! Thank you!
First of all the one I'm looking for is NOT Matching Weights.

In the story the boys have finished a hunt and they get hurt. Sam of course doesn't tell Dean and it gets worse after they go to another hunt. I think Sam was hurt on the abdomen area. Sam then asks Dean for some cash and Dean only gives him a twenty saying that's all he could spare. Sam then walks to a free clinic and meets a doctor who thinks Sam's being abused. He then recommends he goes to the hospital. He takes the taxi because he's tired. At the hospital, the doctor tells Sam to rest and gives him prescription pills to help with the pain. When Sam goes to buy them he finds out he doesn't have enough money so buys the strongest over the counter medicine instead. He gets home and Dean thinks Sam's being mopey or lazy and gets mad that Sam hasn't helped with the current hunt. Then he finds out Sam's hurt and does what he can to help him. There's a scene where Dean calls the doctor in the hospital and finds out that Sam needs a few weeks rest. Then Dean goes to buy the medication feeling bad for not giving Sam the money he asked earlier and that the medicine was a little over twenty dollars. Dean makes Sam rest until he gets better.

I keep reading this story and forgetting the title so if someone would be so kind to tell me the title I'd greatly appreciate it.

Also any stories where Sam is suicidal, has a mental disorder, eating disorder, low self esteem or selective mutism that'd be nice. I don't care if it's slash or not if there's rape or any other stuff in it. One thing though is if it is slash I prefer bottom!Sam but it isn't necessary.

Thank you in advance.
28 July 2015 @ 12:14 am
Basically, all i remember from this fic was that Dean was suicidal and that he self-harmed. I think the boys had the bunker and that Dean had to go to therapy, but i could be mixing stories.

One thing i definitely remember is that there was two endings. One was where Dean was about to commit suicide and had already cut, but then went to Sam and he helped him. The other ending was where Dean actually went through with it and Sam found him the next morning.

Im also pretty sure Dean was on anti-depressants.

Im not sure if Cas was in it or not. It was complete and might have been on FF.net, but im not sure.

If someone could help me find this, i would be so greatful!
I cant find any fics where Sam leaves Dean. I just want to find one where Sam leaves Dean for some Selfish reason and Deans alone and sad and ends with some terriable happening to him. Im a fan of per series where John also leaves Dean, but i would like just some Sam and Dean, but if you add john to the mix it would be fine.

I just want Dean to end up
turned into a creature (werewolf, vampire, ect.)
possessed by a demon (Azazel)
Because Sam (and john) left him and we all know Deans selfworth issues.
(Wicest is fine i dont care just no destiel please)
Current Mood: exhausted
Current Location: My room
05 May 2015 @ 10:12 pm
I've been reading some Sam angst recently but now I'd like some that is focused on Dean. Fics featuring Depressed or suicidal or self-harming are what I'm looking for. No death fics, please. Happy endings are a must, and plenty of caring and protective Sam. Nothing too long (I can only take angst in small doses)20,000-ish words, and preferably no Castiel. No fics that feature John being an asshole. Gen or Wincest is fine, bottom!Dean if there is any sex.
Current Music: CCR
Current Mood: bored
I'm looking for a specific story, but I also love the whole genre of depressed teenage Sam... so fic recs are welcome in addition to finding the specific story.

I don't remember much about the story, but I remember how it emotionally impacted me. So I'm trying to find it again.

Here is what I can recall:

-Winchesters get to a town where they are going to stay for a while. I think, right away, Sam doesn't like it.
-Sam has a sketchbook. He likes to draw.
-At one point, Sam tears up a picture he drew of Dean and himself. This part is important and I think it's when he reaches rock bottom.
-I'm pretty sure Sam self harms in this story (not certain, but pretty sure).
-It's a slow decline, for Sam, into this pit of depression and low self worth.
21 April 2015 @ 12:19 pm
Hey guys, I'm looking for some stories where Dean or Jensen is just fucked up. I'm looking for some high quality angst in a Dean or Jensen centered story. I'm not pick about the length, and my preferred ships are J2, Wincest, DeanCas, and Cockles. I also prefer bottom!Dean and bottom!Jensen, so let me know otherwise, please. If it's RPS, please no wife-hate!
Thank you!!
20 April 2015 @ 11:04 pm
So Jared did this interview with Variety and he talks about how he was diagnosed with clinical depression during the filming of season 3. He had a mental breakdown in his trailer and Jensen came and talked to him. Are there any fics that deal with Jared having depression, either during season 3 or some other time, where Jensen helps him fight it like Jared describes in the interview? Or about them talking in 2015 about what happened to Jared back in Season 3? I'm looking for anything that's not an AU, but is about Jared working on Supernatural and having depression. I don't care if it's Jared/Jensen or just Jared&Jensen being best friends, or even Jared/Gen. Thanks!
I'm looking for a story I was halfway finished reading... I stupidly managed to push a button that simultaneously deleted all my tabs on my iphone and ipad and also the history. Yikes. xP
The fic featured Jared/Jensen with both of them just starting Supernatural together. In the very beginning of the fic, Jared is being beaten (presumably by his father) -- the fic then fast forwards to Jensen at a party where Jared is a server. They get along famously before Jared's manager Alex calls (or something like that) and "his face drains of color'...blah blah. Later on, Jensen's friends Tom and Mike talk about how much they hate Jared because they heard he slept for his part in Gilmore Girls and every other movie.
Long story short, his manager makes him sleep with someone from Supernatural (I think he finds out later that the guy he slept with to get the gig wasn't affiliated with the show at all - it was just his sleazy manager getting rid of an owed favor).
Jared is a nervous wreck through all this, trying to support his family and living with the guilt of how he came to get his acting gigs (or how he thought he got them -- turns out his acting was a thousand times better than he knew them to be)
Sound familiar to anyone?

It was mismanaged by [livejournal.com profile] macbyrne or [livejournal.com profile] miss_managed
Current Mood: aggravated
29 January 2015 @ 11:42 am
I remember pretty much everything about this fic since I read it several times, but I can't find it anymore. It's about how Jared's parents died when he was a kid and he went into the foster system, where he was abused by several different sets of foster parents. He then gets put into the care of the Ackles family, who work on a farm. I think it was split into two different parts, the first one with Jared settling into life on the ranch and getting caught in a flash flood after running away, and the second beginning with Jared attempting to kill himself after Jensen gets mad at him, finishing with him and Jensen finally becoming an official couple at the end around Christmas.
18 January 2015 @ 06:27 am
So I was wondering if anyone has any recs where jared gets drunk, doesn't shower, gets fired, or whatever because he feels miserable for messing up with jensen? If u got em rec em please!
27 October 2014 @ 02:46 pm
OK, so I'm basically looking for some hurt!dean - emotional or physical, I'm not fussy :). Any suggestions welcome, but please NO WINCEST in any form, unless its not explicit in the fic. I'm happy with most pairings, but I would prefer it if they are gen.


#1 Dean hiding a physical injury from Sam & John

#2 Dean feeling depressed about the Hell / Heaven situation (preferably Season 5 onwards)

#3 Stanford Era - Dean feeling abandoned

#4 teen!chesters fic - John leaves Dean too little money / goes for a long time and Dean struggling to cope

#5 teen!Dean gets a boyfriend / develops feelings for a guy and John is a homophobic asshole

Thank you for your help :)
21 October 2014 @ 11:31 pm
I am in need of help in finding a fan fiction that has been on my mind for awhile now.

What I remember is that John catches Dean with drugs. It's set in a park that John told Sam and Dean not to go to. He reacts badly and knocks the stuff onto the ground. Dean cries out and tries to gather what is left. John is shocked at Dean's reaction. Dean had too much pressure on his shoulders while looking out for Sammy and that's why he was doing the drugs.

Any help would be awesome! Thank you :)
15 October 2014 @ 02:04 pm
I am looking for stories that involve pregnancy and/or child loss. I am usually a GenSam person, but I will take any character, rating or pairing this time. I up for anything and everything. The more angsty it is the better.
03 October 2014 @ 02:58 am
Apparently, fall makes me all nostalgic and introspective, and I'm really hankering for some long, slow-burn, angsty first-time Sam/Dean stories. I loved dollylux's Ballad of the Invisible Boy and runedgirl's 143 Alice Grim Lane. I know there have to be more out there like that.

Dark stories are fine - the more angst the better - though I'd prefer there not to be noncon between the boys, and I'm not a big fan of mpreg. Depression, self-harm, AUs, hurt/comfort, it's all great, and I kind of like it when they're brothers. Please, no deathfics that involve either Sam or Dean dying in any kind of permanent way (because I just can't handle that much sadness).

Any favorites along those lines? I would be forever grateful.
Looking for a fic, hurt/comfort variety...Jensen is a stripper by trade, goes to see Jared who is a psychiatrist/psychologist/therapist of some sort because of (Jensen's) self-harming (possibly deliberately or recklessly suicidal?) tendencies. Backstory includes Jensen having an abusive father. Jensen has a young son (3-4) and is trying to keep custody. Jensen has a brother (named Michael maybe?) who is a major ass, but redeems himself by the end, partly due to Jared giving him a talking-to. The brother often takes care of Jensen's son, and tries to seize custody of the little boy at some point. Jared falls for Jensen during their therapy sessions (of course). There is a scene where Jensen is drugged by his ex/boss, and won't let Jared call for help because he's afraid he'll lose his son. There's a scene where the little boy tells Jared that his daddy doesn't cry at night anymore since Jared started coming around. I think Jared leaves his field by the end to pursue other interests, and I believe Jensen winds up becoming a personal trainer. Major schmoop between the J's, and between Jensen and his brother. I've tried searching the corresponding tags that I can think of on here and on the fic sites I usually use, but I'm just not finding it. Thanks to anyone who can help!! :)
Hey there!!!!!!!!!!
I am looking for stories where Sam either attempt suicide or gets seriously injured due to Dean's neglect while he is detoxing in the panic room. I will prefer if it is not wincest!!
Thank you so much!!!
01 September 2014 @ 06:41 pm
Hi friends,
I recently got to read the awesome fics of [livejournal.com profile] freaknout in the journal [livejournal.com profile] fic_freaknout and seriously fell in love with stories about insecure and depressed Jared. And I am really craving for more.
So can you please rec me Non-Au J2 fics where Jared is really depressed/suicidal or has self-esteem issues? Stories where Jared is hiding some deep scars within his cheerful exterior and Jensen helps him get over it? Any Non-Au fics are welcome as long as they have a happy ending.

Thanx a million for always being so helpful :)
25 August 2014 @ 10:34 pm
Hello there! Does anyone know of any fics where young Sam feels like he is less important or is being left out of John and Dean's lives. Sorry crappy explanation!! Anything like https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3473123/1/Something-Missing by: herebutnotremembered would be great. Happy ending's only please. Any length is okay, no WIP please, Self recs are awesome. Wasn't sure of the tags sorry!!
Current Mood: anxious
Current Music: After Ever After
31 July 2014 @ 01:27 am
I'd love any fics that deal with Dean's increasing depression in S9. I've read everything I can find on Ao3 but I'm sure there's some good ones posted on other sites.

Gen preferably, but if there is a ship please don't have the ship be the cure all for Dean's depression.
30 July 2014 @ 10:10 pm
There are four stories I am in search of. deleted AO3 1-4 stories )Would appreciate any assistance in locating these stories or if anyone has a copy of them please let me know and I will exchange emails.

tags: pairing: dean/castiel, !deleted-journal/story, affliction: low self esteem, genre: high school, genre: hurt/comfort, affliction: depression, genre: au, genre: angst, career: military, career: firefighters, career: retail, crossover: merlin
Current Mood: anxious
So, I am looking for fics which have suicidal Sam/Jared. For the SPN version, I would love it if Dean feels guilty about it. (Maybe he said something that pushed Sam over the edge?) If the RPF version deals with eating disorders or homophobia, just drop me a warning. (Oh, and I read 'Monster' by freaknout and I loved it.)

Both Slash and Gen fics are fine. Death fics are more than okay. It can be set in any season, pre-series, non-au or even au. Self-recs are always welcome.
Basically I have no special requirement for this search expect that it focus on suicidal!Sam and/or suicidal!Jared.

Thank you in advance.

Mods: I have this problem where all my tags sometimes disappear after you have approved the entry. It might have something to do with me using a plus account.
Current Mood: sad
Trying to find this fiction.
J2 was on the way back home from set when met with an accident.
Though jensen is ok. Jared was hurt and lost a leg.
Eventually both of them break up as jared unable to cope with holding jensen back with him.
They meet again when jared parent died in an accident.
During the time they breakup, jensen was in depression and drink.
Pls help.
17 April 2014 @ 01:12 pm
I went through the tags and attempted to search through google, and I still haven't been able to find this fic, so maybe you guys can help me!

I don't know the title or author of this fic, but I do remember some details about the fic itself. It was about Sam and Dean in a mental hospital, for a case I believe. The doctor saw Sam's wrist scars from when he was attacked by the ghouls and assumed him suicidal. However, it turns out Sam was suicidal at one point and Dean freaks out. That's about all I remember.
15 April 2014 @ 11:51 am
What I am looking for is a specific story and I can't remember the name for the life of me. So, what I remember is that it had like over 100 chapters I think. Jared was in high school, and Jensen was a millionaire and they met at Jared's work, Jared's family was not OK with him being gay, his mother was conspiring to kill him I think. I do remember there being a trial for his brother and mother for attempted murder. Anyway before that, Jared's friends tried to frame him by spray painting on the Jensen's support group for gays building. J2 also got married and Jared's parents tried to stop it, or showed up or something. That's all I really have, I really hope some of you can help me!


I read this story I while ago and I'm 80% certain I have it as an ePub somewhere in my unorganized 500 fic collection on my tablet, I just can't find it.

From what I remember Dean was miserable because he felt guilty for killing Lisa who was a whore or something and maybe pregnant? Then he ended up in a church somehow (can't remember how) and Castiel was there and then he sprouts wings and passes out. When he wakes up Cas is cleaning his wings.

I know that Dean feels really confused and guilty about him getting wings because he killed Lisa. But of course Cas is there and makes him feel better and then things happen;)

Now I think Cas was a hunter but I don't know of I'm remembering another fic. They at some point end up at Pastor Jim's and Jim tries to kill Dean.

Castiel might also be an angel and they don't know but I'm really, really not sure about that.

Don't think Sam is in this but he could be.

Honestly I'm not sure if I'm remembering one fic or if I'm mixing up parts of different fics but I'm hoping it is all from one.

Thank you

EDIT: Found. Angelus Perditionis by AssButtAnonymous. Had to convert all my ePubs into RTFs (which didn't actually take that long) and bulk search them in-text using Windows Grep, very useful:)
25 February 2014 @ 11:48 am
First time posting here after a year of stalking...

Okay, I've been searching for somewhere I can read 'Heart of the Aftermath' by Emmylizzie? I've messaged her to see if I can gain access to view the stories, but I don't know how often the author is available on LJ (it doesn't look like her page has been updated to public view in about a year or so). If possible, does anyone know any other way I could possibly get in contact with her to ask permission to read her story[s]? Any kind of help would be greatly appreciated, thanks!
04 February 2014 @ 08:53 pm

I search for a Human!AU with Dean/Castiel. Dean had a car accident in which John died and Dean got hurt. Now he sits in wheelchair, has problems with his hands (?) and lives in a care home after he tried to kill himself. Another resident of this home is Jo. Sam is together with Jess and they live in Stanford.

Castiel starts to work as a volunteer and he can Dean persuade to participate in various activities. Also he talks with him about his depression and self harm.

I read the story on Ao3, it was complete and really, really long.

Does someone know the story? Thanks in advance!

- Lilly
29 December 2013 @ 06:35 pm
NOTE: No slash or J2 fics please

Looking for fics where:

*Dean and Sam are homeless or either Sam or Dean are homeless

*Sam is deaf

*Dean and Sam are adopted or either Sam or Dean were adopted

*Dean adopts Sam or becomes his parental guardian (they don't have to be brothers)

*John hits or abuses Sam (no rape please)

*The boys hide injuries

*Sam is bullied

*Sam has cancer

*Sam and Dean are raised apart

*Young Sam (preferably wee!winchester or young adult but older Sam is fine too) has a learning disability such as dsylexia or struggles with his speech

*Sam is suicidal, depressed or self harming

*Sam has low self-esteem

*Sam and Dean are arguing, annoyed with each other, fighting

*Dean becomes violent towards Sam

Also generally looking for:

*Any adorable wee!Winchester fics