Wow, I guess that's it. The title does sound familiar. Sorry for the mixup. Thanks so much feyathene !!!

Uh, Mods, how do I fix the character tag to change Alistaire into Zachariah?

And if anybody knows of similar fics involving Castiel (ie. same warnings: whump!Cas, non-con/dub-con, mental illness, darkfic) I'd love more recommendations.

Thanks again!